Sucker for a Survey

I, like my sister, can't pass up a survey. If gives us a chance to be witty and well, screw around when we just can't stand working on communications plans or teaching small children (oh please - she's the teacher. Don't leave me alone with 34 children in a cement block room. you'd have the next Stephen King novel on your hands.) Anyway... this might be one of the better surveys to cross my path:

1. What's the last thing you put in your mouth?
Echinecia tea. I am a sick girl.

2.What does your last incoming text say?
“Are you here?” Very existential

3.The last song you listened to?
I’d like to pretend it was Beethoven or Wagner, but it was “Dear Mr President” by P!nk

4.Where is your best friend right now?
I have best friends (plural) but in the course of one week I’ll have seen them all and that’s a pretty swell week

5.What did you do yesterday?
Turned oxygen into carbon dioxide

6.Pick a scar on your body. Where'd it come from?
Bridge of my nose - at age 1 1/2. I thought I could catch my older sister. Bitch was fast at 4-years-old.

7.What do you really think happened to Steve on Blues Clues?
Who on What?

8.If you could change your name to anything what would it be?
Emily Cusack

9.What would you say if a guy told you, you were the most beautiful person in world?
"I’ll have what he’s having"

11. How often do you curse?
We might save some time by counting the other minute and a half a day

12. Do you trust all of your friends?
Oh hell no. And if they're smart, they don't trust me

13. Would you move to another state or country to be with the one you love?
That's what I signed up for when I joined: www.americanmailbrides.com

14. Have you ever talked on the phone while in the shower?
Who am I, Donald Trump? Who the eff is that important?

15. Which one of your friends do you think would make the best prostitute?
Well, I'm sure if they put their minds to it, any one of them could get pimped out with the best of them.

16. Are you afraid of falling in love?
Love isn't scary - it's the stalking, cheating, heart-wrenching part that makes folks want to go fetal.

17. Is there someone that popped in your mind after that question?
Danny DeVito -but totally unrelated

18. How many kids do you want to have?
I have better plans for my nether-region

19. Would you make a good parent?
"No, Dr Frankenstein, there will be no "making" of parents"

20. Where was your default picture taken?
Okay, I'm lame. What the eff is that?

21. Honestly, what's on your mind right now?
I'm re-memorizing my multiplication tables. Don't judge me.

22. If you could go back in time and change something, what would it be?
My hairstyle in my fifth-grade school picture. I'd be Mrs Lonnie Nells right now

23. What are you wearing right now?
A shit-eating grin and a scarf

24. Right or Left?
Right brain, left politics

25. Can you make a dollar in change right now?
Look under the sofa cushions, you cheap bastards

26. Have you had a sore throat?
Uhhh...right now. (but what the hell kinda question is that?)

27. Who knows you the best?
There are a few peeps who’ve got my number. But only two I’d call if there was a body that needed burying. (KB/CT)

28. Do you wear contact lenses or glasses?
Never both at once, can you say migraine?

29. Ever been to Mexico?
No, but I’m gonna be awful close in a few days.

30. Last thing that made you laugh out loud?
I might have sheepishly grinned a couple times during this survey

31.Would you show your boobs to a midget on roller skates?
Boobs, midget - sure, but roller skates scare the eff out of me

32. Did you miss anyone yesterday?
Marty. Every day.

33. Last person to lay in your bed?
I like to pretend that while I'm at work, George Clooney flies in and writes poetry in my bed. He’s kind enough to leave it just as he found it.

34. What are your plans for the weekend?
Can you say San Diego, baby??

35. Who do you think will repost this?
Z mentioned answering it her ownself.